Second test

What now?

That's Laura Csortan, former Miss Australia. Maybe I need to improve my personal grooming. On the other hand, she's the troll.

I missed most of the first session of this Test because I was writing a Heckler for the Sydney Morning Herald. The Heckler editors sent a message via the Column 8 editors last Thursday that they didn't need any more Heckles of bike paths, oversized prams, rude waitstaff and mobile phone etiquette. What they did need, urgently, or so they said, were rants about "cosmology, architecture, literature and aggressive ducks". It just so happens that cosmology is one of my chief pet hates, so I got down to it. They haven't got back to me. My fault for buying into the grumpy old persons sections of the paper I suppose.

But I'll take the segue: as much as the grumpy old persons in the Grandstand box mutter about T20 cricket, they roll over like puppies when someone plays T20 cricket in the middle of a Test match. One of the South African commentators suggested Dave Warner's performance on the first day was like "clubbing baby seals". I'll say it was also like "tickling puppies' tummies". Mine included, what's not to enjoy?

At the other end of the spectrum, and the Test, was plenty of "real Test cricket". I tried to induce a wicket this afternoon with a nap, but it was like reverse Rip Van Winkle: when I woke up, nothing had changed. I'm glad to see Nathan Lyon doing well, because like many a spinner he looks like the kind to get sand kicked in his face, maybe by someone like Shane Watson. Peter Siddle reminded me that when I am on the treadmill and I think I'm pushing myself a bit, I am so not pushing myself, but that's why we watch them and not me.

There was a lot of talk on the radio about how "digging in" was part of the South African national character. I hope they meant something about velds, because if the English love a gritty stand because it reminds them of the Blitz, what special cultural symbol of intransigence do you think of in relation to South Africa?

Distractions

I've been seeing a bit of soccer, because my new friend's a member of Sydney FC. I am constantly reminded that one of the reasons I follow cricket is because it is slow enough for me to work out what is going on, but I still have my other skills to fall back on. To wit, my take on Alessandro Del Piero:

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For these and other reasons, it's a lot easier to maintain focus when he has the ball.